(negative content warning)
i never know how ppl deal with the terrible emotion after something bad happend, i often get the advice: change your thought about it, see things with more angles.
Then i'm just like "i know the step 'being positive', but i dont know how to do it, if i knew i wouldn't need advice"
then another advice comes: instead of saying 'i dont know' to your self, you should ask 'how can i make it better' to yourself.
i'm like fell into a endless loop.
did something wrong> sad> trying to be positive> failed> i dont know how> slap myself and thinking i cant use negative thought!> i still not feel any better> do something wrong cuz of bad emotion, bad judgement and bad luck>loop again.
now i think, i should quit some things.
im just an easy breakable glass, and too many rocks of responsibilities are filling me. i want to do many things, but cant do everything perfect, so the rocks start falling down when i shake, i try to pick up some but instead, other rocks falling down. and i feel like the most worthless glass ever.
1.job from the restuarnt.
2.the thought of teaching and helping everyone, there's no one helping me at all, instead i just kept getting bad comments, and no one takes my important words seriously. fuck i gonna start charging ppl for giving my precious advices.
3.the fucking posters of club i have to do every week......im so sick of it.
why ppl have to be assholes.